MARRIAGE
2. "And marry those among you who are single" (24:32)
3. "Do not prevent them (the divorced women) from marrying their husbands when they agree among themselves in a lawful manner" (2:232).
4. "And they (your wives) have made with you a firm covenant" (4:21).
5. "He it is Who created you from a single being, and of the same kind did He make his mate that he might incline to her" (7:189).
6. "And one of His signs is that He created mates for you from yourselves that you may find quiet of mind in them and He put between you love and compassion" (30:21).
7. "He made mates for you from among yourselves ........... multiplying you thereby" (42:11).
8. "And the chaste from among the believing women and the chaste from among those who have been given the Book before you are lawful for you when you have given them their dowries, taking them in marriage, not fornicating, nor taking them for paramours in secret" (5:5).
9. "Forbidden to you are your mothers, and your daughters, and your sisters, and your paternal aunts, and your maternal aunts, and brothers' daughters, and sisters' daughters, and your mothers that have suckled you, and your foster-sisters, and mothers of your wives, and your step-daughters who are in your guardianship born of your wives to whom you have gone in--but if you have not gone in to them, there is no blame on you--and the wives of your sons who are of your own loins, and that you should have two sisters together except what has already passed...........and all married women except those whom your right hands possess" (4:23, 24). p. 267
10. "And give women their dowries as a free gift but if they of themselves be pleased to give you a portion of them, then eat it with enjoyment and with wholesome result" (4:4).
11. "And you have given one of them a heap of gold, take not from it anything" (4:20).
12. "There is no blame on you about what you mutually agree after what is appointed of dowry. (4:24).
13. "And if you fear that you cannot act equitably towards orphans, marry such women as seem good to you, two and three and four; but if you fear that you will not do justice between them, then (marry) only one or what your right hands possess. (4:3).
14. "And whoever among you has not within his power ampleness of means to marry free believing women, (he may marry) of those whom your right hands possess from among your believing maidens............So marry them with the permission of their masters and give them their dowries justly" (4:25).
The Arabic word for marriage is nikāh which means, originally 'aqd or uniting. It is recognised in Islām as the basis of human society, and marriage-relationship is given the same importance as blood-relationship (v. 1). Celibate life its against the teachings of the Holy Qurān which requires every Muslim to live in a married state (v. 2: h. 1), Castration is forbidden (hh. 2, 3), Marriage is a sacred contract (v. 4), which a man and a woman enter into by mutual agreement (v. 3). It is a contract entered into for life, temporary marriage being forbidden (h. 4). It serves a double purpose, being the means of the moral uplift of man and the means of the multiplication. of the human race (vv. 5-7). Marriage may be contracted with a non-Muslim woman (v. 8). It is prohibited within certain degrees of relationship (v. 9). The rule is the marriage of one man with one woman, but in exceptional cases a man may marry up to four women (v. 13). Marriage with slave-girls was allowed in case a man had not the means to marry a free woman (v. 14).
Marriage should be preceded by a proposal (h. 5). It is recommended that before making a proposal, a man should satisfy himself as to the desirability of the match (hh. 6, 7). The guardian must obtain the woman's consent (h. 8); where a woman was given in marriage by tier father and she disliked the match, the marriage was annulled (b. g). Marriage among equals is recommended, but all Muslims being equal there is no limitation as to the choice of the mate (b. 10). Nobility of character is the most valuable gift of a woman which should be taken into consideration in marrying her (b. 11). A dowry must be settled upon the woman, there being no limitation as to the amount (vv. 10, 11; h. 5): it may be increased or decreased by mutual consent after marriage (v. 12). Any conditions may be laid down at the time of marriage. so long as they are not against the law of Islām (h. 12). Shighār is prohibited (h. 13). The marriage must be publicly proclaimed, and it is recommended that
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it should be held in a public place and announced with the beat of duff, a musical instrument (h. 14). The contract is sanctified by a sermon before the parties announce their acceptance (h. 15). Gatherings on the occasion of marriage are also a means of making it publicly known (h. 16). Music is allowed at the marriage ceremony (h. 17). Gifts may also be given on this occasion (h. 18). A feast is recommended when the bride comes to the husband's house (hh. 19, 20), Prayer to God for Divine blessings is recommended at the first meeting of the husband and the wife (h. 21). Birth-control is allowed when it becomes a necessity (hh. 22, 23). When a baby is born, adhān must be called out into its ears (h. 24), and the naming and the tahnīk follow (h. 25). 'Aqīqah must also be performed if one can afford (hh. 26-28).
1 'Alqamah said,
While I was going along with 'Abd Allāh, he said, We were with the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, and he said:
"He who is able to marry should marry, for it keeps the eye cast down and keeps a man chaste; and he who cannot, should take to fasting, for it will have a castrating effect upon him.1
(B. 30:10.)
1. Marriage is here recognised as a means of moral elevation and spiritual exaltation. Fasting has a castrating effect inasmuch as the carnal passions are thereby subdued. According to another hadīth, marriage is recognised as the Sunnah of the Holy Prophet, and it is added; "He who abstains from my Sunnah is not of me." (B. 67:l.)p. 269
2 Ibn Mas'ūd said,
We used to fight along with the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, and we had not (our) wives (with us); so we said, May we not castrate, O Messenger of Allāh? And he forbade us doing so.2
(B. 67:64)
3 Sa'd said, The Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, repudiated Uthmān ibn Maz'ūn's remaining celibate, and if he had permitted him, we would have been emasculated.(B. 67:8.)
4 'Alī reported,The Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, forbade temporary marriage with women, and the eating of domestic asses. on the day of Khaibar.3
(B. 64:40.)
3 So in Islām there are no eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven. On the other hand, marrying and keeping oneself chaste is a means of attaining the kingdom of heaven.4. The technical word for temporary marriage is mut'ah. It is derived from matā' meaning profiting for a long time. Mut'ah is considered to be a legal form of marriage by the Shī'ahs, but the vast majority of the Muslim community p. 269 rejects it on the basis of the hadīth quoted here. The Holy Qur'ān uses the word ihsān (lit. being inaccessible) for marriage, and thus looks upon marriage as a permanent relation which can be cutoff only by divorce. For all other kinds of sexual relationship it uses the word safāh, which signifies fornication According to some hadīth, mut'ah was allowed by the Holy Prophet in a war. Even if this be true, it may have been allowed at an earlier stage, reform having been brought about gradually, but there is not the least doubt that it was finally disallowed.
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5 'Ā'ishah reported,
In the pre-Islamic times marriage was in four ways; one of these being as the people's marriage to-day, a man asking another man for marriage with his ward or his daughter, then he settles on her a dowry, then marries her.4
(B 67:37.)
6 Jābir said,The Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, said When one of you asks a woman in marriage, then if he is able that he should look into what invites him to have her in marriage, he should do it."
(AD. 12:17.)
4. Khitbah or asking a woman in marriage is a preliminary stage. The dowry to be settled on the woman must then be agreed upon. There is no limitation p. 272 to this amount; it may be a heap of gold (v. 11), or it may be a ring of iron, or even service rendered to the woman in teaching her (B. 67:51). In fact, the amount of the dowry depends on the circumstances of the contracting parties.p. 272
7 Mughīrah reported,
He made a proposal of marriage to a woman, and the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, said:
"See her, for this is more likely to bring about agreement between you."
(Tr. 9:5.)
8 Abū Hurairah reported,The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, said
"The widow shall not be married until she is consulted, and the virgin shall not be married until her consent is obtained."
They said, O Messenger of Allāh! How shall her consent be obtained? He said. "(It is sufficient) that she remains silent."5
(B. 67:42.)
5. Hh. 8 and 9 show that a woman must be given in marriage by her guardian; but the guardian, whether father or anyone else must obtain the woman's consent. As many hadīth show, a woman is at liberty to offer her hand to anyone, and Bukhārī heads one of his chapters as follows: "A woman offering herself for marriage to a virtuous man" (B. 67:33 ). In such a case, the state is considered to be the guardian (B. 67:41).p. 272
9 Khansā' reported,
Her father gave her away in marriage, and she was a thayyib, and she did not like it. So she came to the Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, and he annulled her marriage.6
(B. 67:43.)
10 'Ā'ishah said,The Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, said:
"Select (fit) women (in respect of character) for your seed, and marry (your) equals and give (your daughters) in marriage to them."7
(IM. 9:46.)
11 Abū Hurairah reported,The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, said:
"A woman is married on account of four things;
6. Thus the woman has the choice of repudiating a marriage to which she is not a consenting party. The word thayyib includes both a woman whose husband has died and a woman who has been divorced.
7. Marriage must be contracted so far as possible between equals. This is technically known as marriage in kuf' or kufu' (pl. akfā'). Bukhārī explains this by heading his chapter as "Al-Akfa fi-l-dīn" (67:16), or Equals in religion; making it clear that all Muslims are equal in one sense. There are examples recorded in Hadīth in which a woman of the high family of Quraish was married to a slave or a freed slave (B. 64: 12).
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on account of her wealth, and on account of (the nobility of) her family, and her beauty, and on account of her character,8 so attain success with the one possessing nobility of character." (B . 67: 16.)
12 'Uqbah said,
The Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, said:
"The conditions which are most worthy that you should fulfil are those with which you legalize sexual relations."9
(B. 54:6.)
13 Ibn 'Umar reported,The Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, forbade, shighār; and shighār is this that a man gives his daughter in marriage to another man on condition that the latter shall give his daughter in marriage to him, neither of them paying dowry.10
(B. 67:29.)
8. Religion. in contrast with the other three, builds character, and hence the word din carries the significance of character here.9. Any conditions which the parties agree upon may be laid down in the marriage contract, so long as they are not against the law. For instance, it is stated that a woman shall not impose a condition requiring the divorce of her sister (B. 67:54).10. The dowry must be made over to the woman, and her father or guardian has no right to it. Hence shighār is forbidden.
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14 'Ā'ishah said,
The Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, said:
Make the marriage publicly known, and perform it in mosques, and beat at it with duff."11
(Tr-Msh. 13:3.)
15 Abd Allāh said:'The Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, taught us the marriage sermon (which is thus):12
"All praise is due to Allāh; we beseech Him for help, and we ask for His protection, and we seek refuge in Him from the mischiefs of our souls; whomsoever Allāh guides, there is none who can lead him astray and whomsoever Allāh finds in error, there is none to guide him;
11. Duff or daff is the tambourine, and the object of beating with daff at marriage is to make it publicly known. It also furnishes a kind of music.
12. The khutbah or sermon at marriage helps the publicity of the marriage, and serves the double purpose of sanctifying the marriage contract and informing the parties of their responsibilities. The three verses of the Holy Qur'ān quoted in the sermon are 4:1 (a part), 3:101, and 33:70, 71. V. 4: 1 runs thus: p. 275
"O people! Be careful of your duty to your Lord. Who created you from a single being and created its mate of the same kind, and spread from these two many men and women; and be careful of your duty to Allāh by Whom you demand one of another your rights and to the ties of relationship; surely Allāh ever watches over you."The whole of this verse may be recited instead of the part given in the Hadīth. They all lay stress on carefulness to duty. and the person who delivers the sermon must expatiate on them to make the audience realize their import. The khutbah is followed by ījāb and qubūl, i.e.. the acceptance of the parties to the contract, and the amount of dowry is made publicly known. This is followed by a prayer by the whole gathering that the union may be blessed.
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and I bear witness that there is no god but Allāh and that Muhammad is His servant and His Messenger. 'O you who believe! Be careful of your duty to Allāh, by Whom you demand one of another your rights, and to the ties of relationship; surely Allāh watches over you. 'O you who believe! Be careful of your duty to Allāh with the care which is due to him, and do not die unless you are Muslims.' 'O you who believe! Be careful of your duty to Allāh and speak the right word; He would put for
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you your deeds into a right state and forgive you your faults; and whoever obeys Allāh and His Messenger, he indeed achieves a mighty success."
(AD. 12:3l.)
16 Anas said,The Prophet, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, saw women and children coming from a wedding, so the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, stood up erect and said: "O Allāh! You are the most loved of all people to me." He said this three times.13
(B. 63:5.)
17 'Ā'ishah said,She conducted the bride to a man from among the Ansār. And the
13 The nikāh was followed by a ceremony of conducting the bride to the bridegroom, called 'urs or 'urus, at which people gathered together, and thus it received additional publicity. The hadīth further shows the Holy Prophet's deep love for women and children. As these women and children were from among the Ansār, the Hadīth is narrated by Bukhārī in a chapter dealing with "the love of the Ansār."
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Prophet of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, said, "O 'Ā'ishah! Why had you no music with you, for the Ansār love music?14
(B. 67:64.)
18 Anas said,The Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, had Zainab conducted to him on the occasion of his marriage with her; so Umm Sulaim said to me, What i if we send a present to the Messenger of Allāh? peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, I said to her, Do it. So she took dates and butter and cheese, and made a preparation mingling them in a cooking-pot, and sent me with it to him. And I went with it to him, and he said, Place it (here15)."
(B. 67:65.)
14. The word used in the hadīth is lahw, which means a thing in which a man delights himself and which occupies him so as to divert him, and includes every diversion, pastime, sport or play. Here it means music.15. Giving of presents at marriage is therefore in accordance with the Sunnah.
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19 Anas said,
Zainab bint Jahsh was conducted as a bride to the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, and bread and meat were served, and I was sent to invite people to the feast. A party came and had the meal, then went out; then another party came and had the meal and went out; I went on thus inviting until I could not find any one whom I should invite.16
(B. 65-33:8.)
20 Ibn 'Umar reported,The Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, said:
"When one of you is invited to a marriage feast, he should go to it."
(B. 67:72.)
16. This feast is called walimah and it is given by the bridegroom when the bride has been conducted to him. It is said to be derived from iltiyām which means gathering together of two people.p. 279
21 Ion 'Abbās said, carrying it back to the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, (who) said:
"If one of you, when he goes in to his wife, should say, 'In the name of Allāh; O Allāh! Ward off from us the Devil and ward off the Devil from that which Thou grantest us, then offspring is decreed for them, it (the Devil) will not harm it."
(B. 4:8.)
22 Jābir said,We used to resort to 'azl17 in the time of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, and the Qur'ān was then being revealed.
(B. 67:97.)
23 Abū Sa'īd said,.... We resorted to 'azl, then we asked the Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, and he said:
"What! Do you do it?" He said this thrice.
"There is no soul that is
17. 'Azl was a birth-control device. It originally means putting a thing aside or away, and with reference to sexual relations, paulo ante emissionem (penem suum) extraxit, et extra vulvam semen emisit. It is allowed when conception is likely to endanger the woman's life or impair her health.
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to be till the day of Resurrection but it will come into life."
(B. 67:97)
24 Abū Rāfi' said,I saw the Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, calling out adhān for prayer in the ear of Hasan ibn 'Alī, when Fātimah gave birth to him.18
(Tr-Msh. 19:1)
25 Abū Mūsā said,A son was born to me and I brought him to the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, He named him Ibrāhīm, and he chewed a date and rubbed thereby his palate, and prayed for blessings for him and gave him back to me.19
(B. 71:l.)
18. This is the first act with regard to a Muslim baby. The words of the adhān are repeated opposite the right ear, and the words of iqāmah opposite the left. The latter is based on a report in the Sharh al-Sunnah showing that 'Umar ibn 'Abd al-'Azīz followed this practice. The practice is traced back to the Holy Prophet in the Musnad of Abū Ya'lā. The utterance of words relating to the unity and greatness of Allāh in the ears of a new-born baby shows that the Holy Prophet was aware of the existence of the sub-conscious mind.19. The Arabic word is hannaka-hū. The word tahnīk is derived from hanak which means the interior of the upper part of the inside of the mouth, or the palate. The new-born baby is made to taste either a chewed date as in this case, or honey, by some elderly member of the family. The naming of the baby. the tahnīk and a prayer for him are thus the sunnah of the Holy Prophet.
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26 Salmān ibn 'Āmir said,
I heard the Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, say:
"In the case of the boy is 'aqīqah, so pour blood for him and remove from him the uncleanness."20
(B. 71:2.)
27 Umm Kurz said,I heard the Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, say:
"In the case of a boy, two goats, and in the case of a girl, one goat (should be sacrificed.)"21
(Tr-Msh. 19:3.)
28 Ibn 'Abbās said,The Messenger of Allāh, peace and blessings of Allāh be on him, sacrificed a ram each in the case of Hasan and Husain.
(AD-Msh. 19:3.)
20. The word 'aqīqah is derived from 'aqqa meaning he clave, split or cut; and 'aqqa an waladi-hī signifies he slaughtered as a sacrifice for his child a sheep or a goat (on the seventh day after the birth). This is called 'aqīqah, but the word is also applied to the hair, of a young one recently born, that comes forth on his head in his mother's belly, the hair being shaved on the seventh day. It is in reference to this that the Hadīth speaks of removing of uncleanness.21. This is the general practice, but as the next hadīth shows, one goat suffices in the case of the boy as well. It is only for those who can afford.
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